Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Striptease of Time

“Striptease”……….. !!

All eyes must have caught a bold glance of this word. It is a very covetous and most of us get conscious with the mere mention of this word. Some become so very conscious that they even tour Bangkok and other such tourist place. But it happens every day in front of us and we do not even notice this happening and this happens to all of us.

In the lush green campus of Patna University when there was cacophony everywhere a guy was walking alone immersed in his own world and oblivious of all noises and distractions. He was probably floating on the air towards the banks of river Ganges.

“Vipin ! Vipin” and he become aware that somebody is calling him from behind.

He stops and by the time he could turn around Milind came near to him breathing heavily. 

“Oh Yaar Vipin! What were you thinking? I have been calling you since you entered the gate and you made me chase you like anything.”

“It’s ok. What is so important?”

“Nothing you lost idiot. I just felt like jogging and so was running behind you. Stupid “ 

“Ok. Ok. Hang on. Get your breaths back to normal. Let us walk towards Kaali Ghaat (the name of one bank of river Ganges inside the college campus)”

“Fine. Let us walk, but tell me what was that you were thinking all about which has made you lost?”

“Nothing as such yaar. I was just thinking about how to use Input - Output Model in the context of an Individual firm.”

“Oh, I was expecting only such kind of thing from you Mr. Brain Brawny. Do you have anything else apart from Economics and Literature in your life Mr. Uncle?”

This was what Vipin was. He was considered to be among one of the most brilliant students of Economics in the University and a person of varied interests ranging from Literature to Music and which also did incorporate Debates and other extracurricular activities. 

In short, he was a perfect example of moronic impractical. 

“Yes, what was so important that you were running behind me?” After seating themselves besides the bank Vipin asked to Milind.

“Yaar, we all need your help” 

“What? My help? What’s up dude?” 

“Nothing much buddy. It is Just a little showdown.”

“Showdown! Hey, what is all this? I am not the game.”

“No, No Vipin. You are no where. You are not the game. This is us who are to play. We just need you to support us by creativity.”

“Hey, hang on. What is all this? First you explain to me and trust you me I am not going to be in any kind of your mess.”

“Hey Guys! You all are sitting here and we were looking for you all around.” Satish, Praveen, Ramakrishnan and other of the gang joined in.

“Guys, I was asking Vipin for his help for the planned thing and he is not agreeing.” Milind has said this to all in a tone like India TV is broadcasting Breaking News.

“Yaar Vipin. Come on. Don’t be a spoil sport. We just need you to write something for us. It is only you who can write good among any one of us. We need just this much favor from you, for friends buddy.” Praveen said. 

“Hold on! Hold on! What is this that I need to write for you guys? Will somebody bother to tell me?”

“A simple and plain Love Letter” Ramakrishnan said it simply and plainly.

“What! A love letter” are you guys nuts? And by the way to who?”

“Yaar, will you do this for us or not? We asked you thinking you are our best friend and here you are asking so many questions. Do you think we are going to play some kind of punk with you? Let us go guys, seems he does not trust us.”

“Wait a minute! Wait a minute! It’s ok. If it is only a love letter I will write. But tell me who is going to give this letter to who.” Vipin tried to cool all his buddies.

What a paradox! Vipin’s day did start from Input – Output model and was now hovering to Love letter and that too without knowing for who by whom. But Vipin is ready almost to do this. 

I told you, he was a perfect example of moronic impractical. Wasn’t I right?

“Ok! You know Manisha”

“Who Manisha?”

“Hey Mr. Economics, the hot babe in your department, man.”

“Ok! Yes. “

“She has taken a fight with all of us, and so is this the show down”

“Hang on! Is this love letter for her”

“Nopes! For all the girls in her group”

“Lord! What is this? How can there be one common love letter for all the girls of the same group”

“That is why you are called Mr. Intelligent”

“What shall we do"

“Write a letter that seems to be a love letter and ends with befooling”

“Great idea! So do that for us Vipin”

“Will you guys hand over this letter in person to the ladies?”

“Nopes! We have got all their postal address” all smiled mischievously.

“Ok! I write this for you guys, but I am not the game buddies.”

“Ok Vipin. Rest assured you are not the game”

The letter is written

“Dear …….

I don’t know whether any one has told you before or not but you are the most beautiful woman God has ever created on this earth. You are the final definition of beauty of the creation and Love of the nature. 

If you can trust me, I have fallen deep in your love and I could not perceive a life devoid of you. This is one reason why I do not loose upon any opportunity having a word with you and believe you me your voice comes to me like the finest mid notes coming out of Sitar. Have you ever marked that you are not keeping your feet on ground but on your every step I lay my heart for you to walk on.

This reminds me, why don’t you change your sandals? Have you ever seen how torn are they? Which brand do you use? They are just torn flat and sound like prit – a - prat. How disgusting? Next time when you go to shop buy Bata and please do not expect me buying you one as I am like always out of pocket. I hope you were glad for a while walking on my heart but excuse me, I have kept it for some one else who I am sure you would not be interested in knowing and nor I will be interested in telling you. Look at your noses. They are so red like you have just smelled a chilli and so do I expect you to stop reading his nonsense and go to the washroom to clear them off.

Lovingly Yours…."

A week later the Principal of the college was frantically looking for the mischief but thankfully he didn’t go to the police. Not because of his benevolence but because of the fear of the parents of the Girls. The gang thanked the pusillanimous parents.

“ Striptease !” When it happens to us we do not know how to react. The striptease of time soaks all our adrenaline and leave us feel helpless; howsoever powerful one be.

So the gang was out of the college well settled except for Mr. Intelligent, Vipin. He started working with the private sector that too of Indian Origin. One can imagine what repentance path God has chosen for him. What else can be a better hell than being born in India and working in a private firm of Indian Origin.

So, one fine day his lady boss afraid of his intelligence handed him a letter which read like this”

“Dear Mr. Vipin

It is really an honor having you in my team and no doubt that your contribution has made my team the best team in the industry.

But, as you know the recession has eroded the maximum share of market our company will not be able to take the load of so many employees for the time being.

We as a token of appreciation are giving your dues with all incentives that you are entitled for with this letter and as soon as this recession will be over we would be working together again.

With best wishes.

Yours Sincerely…."

With soaked adrenaline Vipin moved towards his home to make calls to all his college “buddies” for help knowing no body will either pick up the phone and if mistakenly anyone picks up it will be of no use.

I hope Striptease now is not that covetous to you for your ogling eyes.

Good Day

Utpal Kant Mishra
Mumbai; March 29, 2011

Sunday, March 27, 2011

A Lazy Bone


“will you like to wake up Sweetheart” ! The always euphonic and rhythmic voice of my wife with a gentle touch did ask me today also.

“unhhhh ….. Noooo, a little later” I muttered and skidded deep in my cocooned world of dreams again.

“The day is about to end honey, wanna get up now”! I later realized that this sound has echoed after more than couple of hours.

“What’s the time”

“Only 11 AM”

“Oppssss…..” I sprang up feeling headache which was nothing but the aftermath of over – sleeping.
Not far away I used to wake up at 6:30 in the morning and this is the same I who forces myself inside the bed as if I never want to wake up again.

I am thinking now that this forced laziness is a by product of lack of desire to struggle any more. In fact not the struggle but deming of the hope that “My Day” will also come and I will come clear with the achievement for which I have laid more than forty Years of my life.

Strange is the phenomenon of the state of mind. We all are normal to the extent that we all believe to be normal. But all ours normality is subject to certain abnormalities which if under certain societal boundary line is not considered to be psychological. But every normality has certain abnormality imbibed in it.

My abnormality has become chasing the success. I have even forgotten what success I am chasing for. Is it money, is it position, is it stability, is it family or is it something else. But in all my normality I am chasing success and the more I am chasing it the more unstable and unsuccessful I am becoming.

“Good Morning Mr. Mishra!” Every morning it is this voice of Ms. Yamini greets me and this is one voice that I hate the most. Circumstantially, my chase has landed me with this present so called boss of mine and so is my obligation to be greeted every morning with this voice every day. On top of the world I am forced to hear this voice by giving her a call from my side as first thing in the morning. I hope God will forgive me for this sin of making him number two in waiting to be remembered.

“So, what’s up for today”, as if I will be divulging something as RAW Chief briefing Prime Minister everyday morning. “Why not this, what happened to that, good…., ok……. Let’s see, brief me of your day in evening again…….” And with all this I not only feel but also do jump inside my bed again. Tired and Jejune before the day could have started.

The “Corporate” routine of mine is going to schools, meeting the management, taking all shits from them, catching up local of Mumbai back to home thinking how productive or creative was the day, and this is what I am expected and ordered to do everyday. This is underlined “Duty” read “Fundamental Duties” of Part 1V A of Indian Constitution for me.

If 14 years of my chase has given me this than I am sure to be lazy enough to leave my bed.

So, my day starts with “ I will be going to Schools. Say 4 Nos, will be co ordinating with the team and will try to close up some deal as soon as possible”. Mechanically these things come out of my mouth considering the cheque to come the next month.

As an average Indian after double masters degree from anonymous Colleges one is expected to only one thing in their rest of lifes “Worry about next month of pay cheque” and religiously checking every years February End the Budget passed by the Indian Government whether any relief has been given to us kind of children of lesser god, knowingly that there will be nothing for us in there.

“Ok! Fine Mr. Mishra ! Everyone suggests their product is good. What is so different with your company? Let me know what “benefit” we will get if suppose we go for your Product.” 

One of the School Principal’s asked me this thoughtful question without asking or even knowing about our product and offerings. I realize that after all they are the builders of future brains of this country as ours have built us and so they might have got some kind of premonitive knowledge about rest of the unsaid things.

“Sir, we will provide all and every kind of service better and more than any other players in this market” I replied with a beatific and meaningful smile on my lips.

“Ok! So let me have a word with our Directors and as soon as they be free we will keep your Demonstration amongst them. Keep in touch Mr. Mishra and by the way you are an experienced person.” He replied with similar smile on his lips.

“Oh … Really! Good Mr. Mishra. Let us hope we get some business soon. This will help you also Mr. Mishra. You know you are still short on your Targets.” The evening call which I did make to Ms. Yamini did sound this. Wondering what was good in this all I cramped on bed dry and jejune. 

I wonder if this is what I had to do why did I spared long years in cramming degrees of Maters in Economics and Master of Business Administration. These things can be done even by if not illiterates than by an school drop out. Now these degrees sounds alien and geek to me and I ask myself did I really do these? Why? I am getting toasts for drudgery and so if I wouldn’t have wasted time on Education I would have been having this same toast in at least BMW 7 Series.

Mumbai’s sultry weather never make me this tired as my everyday plight do make me, which is more mental than physical.

Though mental I am normal in the parlance of all normal people walking on the streets. I only imagine Mangoes in winter and lotus in desert. Nothing abnormal about it till I only imagine the things and keep them with me. The day I start speaking up some Psychologist from anonymous or known college will be having their toast with top up cheese being paid from my otherwise loan stripped pocket. For the sake of my poor pocket I am feloniously making them feel their degrees geek too.

“And the next person on the Dias is Mr. Mishra the famous philosopher writer……..”

“Ufff …. You are still sleeping. Good morning darling and I am moving to my office. Get up now”. 

 The same euphonic and rhythmic voice of my wife with a gentle touch realized me that again I am dreaming late on a working day in bed.

Good Morning ….. !!

Utpal Kant Mishra
Mumbai; March 27, 2011